Nutrition
When I arrived at the HA I was healthy and strong. The diet was so different than what I was accustomed to : very little efficient protein, legumes, and vegetables. There was plenty of pasta, denatured breads, soda, fruit juice, cereals, and desserts. After consuming this very high sugar-starch diet for a couple months I developed anemic symptoms. I was surprised that after writing down my symptoms it filled a full sheet of paper! I was exhausted, could hardly function, would cry easily, had little emotional control, and a constant headache. The most startling of my symptoms was coming out of the shower with bruises wherever the washcloth touched my skin! I was covered with tiny black and red bruises! As I researched my conditions it became clear to me that I was malnourished.
Ron Luce had told my friend that he wanted to know what was happening on campus. She worked as his AA. She was also experiencing many ill health effects and had eaten much healthier pre-HA. So we emailed back and forth as I was discovering my maladies actually being from malnourishment. She felt that it was such an excellent explanation of the situation that she forwarded her email onto Ron. Soon after this I was contacted by Judy, the campus dietician. She pulled me aside one day and informed me that she received my email and she wanted to meet with me about it. She was clearly angry. Knowing that it would not be a good meeting I was non-committal. Valencia, my DI (director of interns), then emailed me informing me of a meeting that was scheduled for the three of us.
I will never forget the meeting. Judy opened in a defensive tone that remained throughout by asking me the problems I had with the diet she had created. I shared with her my basic understanding of nutrition and that there were not enough true vegetables, too many simple carbohydrates and not enough protein. Not once during the meeting did anybody do anything to address my personal diet related health concerns. This meeting was about her pride, not about my or other interns wellbeing. She informed me that she was the one with the education, that I had far too many lofty ideas, and that the K-Crew was already working like a sweatshop. She told me that I should make a food plan for the internship if I thought I could do this better than her. She also told me that Teen Mania isn’t a fat camp. She failed to address the seriousness of fat related weight gain that many interns experienced.
Both Judy and Valencia came to the conclusion that I was being rebellious and that Satan had his hands in my mind. The punishments for my health suggestions were:
1) Extra K-Crew assignments until I understood how hard it is to cook.
2) Grounded to my room for many nights.
3) I was not allowed to talk to anybody about what happened in this meeting.
4) I had to write a report on the danger of rebellion.
The meeting was concluded with prayer for me to be delivered from Satan. Her accusations were leveled against me with the same kind of rage I’ve seen in my own abusive mother. I knew not to question irrationality. Further discussion would only make her more defensive. I had been down that painful road before. Valencia, had a short unpleasant follow up with me. It is amazing how a woman who hadn’t spent any time trying to get to know me could take me down to ZERO, especially when her position was meant to be motherly.
Fast forward two years. I was talking with a good friend of mine who had been a CA the same year that I experienced this nutritional assault. Being very passionate about nutrition as well, he shared with me that he had in fact created a comprehensive food plan like the one Judy asked me to create. His explanation of the plan was thorough and excellent in every way, analyzing the actual nutrients in the food not only calorie value. Sadly, this plan that was created long before I was even on campus, was rejected outright.
Returning to my story…After learning that Katie Luce was very disciplined about her diet, I asked her some questions. She talked about some of the nutrient dense foods she feeds her family. I asked her why the Honor Academy doesn’t provide nutrient dense food for the interns or missionaries. She then told me that God will take care of you when you are doing things for him and that the foods that you eat will not really effect you. It actually reminds me of a favorite comedian’s joke: “Dear Lord, please change this Cheeto’s molecular structure into a carrot as it passes my throat, Amen”
Later, the intern women watched a video on nutrition from the State Health Department of Texas. I became aware that this video was a public rebuttal to my meeting with Judy. Large, monopolized, agricultural companies influence state programs. This video was created by one of those monopolies – Kraft – who creates the famous “Mac and Cheese” and foods with the same nutritional quality. By claiming that plants create their own pesticides they explained in the video that an Organic food is no different than a conventional food. This was too much for me to handle because I know horror stories of cancers that conventional farmers get while working with these “extra” pesticides that no organic farmer has ever gotten working with the plants “natural” pesticides.
Teen Mania would be wise to honor the commitment that every intern and missionary makes by preparing for them healthy and nourishing foods so that they can best serve God with their bodies. Diets deplete of nutrients will cause harm and disease. Excellence is lacking in this area.
(Conclusion with part 3 tomorrow.)
43 comments:
kymberlydawn says:
April 13, 2010 at 7:05 AM
I was shocked when not long ago Ron & Katie made a fundraising video to support Beth Hasz’s cancer treatment. Instead of utilizing modern medicine paid for by TM’s health plan, they wanted alumni to donate to the Hasz’s personal fund so Beth could eat all organic produce and travel to Italy for a woo-woo treatment. I’m all about holistic medicine and think it should be on health plans, but come-on, you want people who were malnourished in your cult to now pay for your uber nourishment!!! Such arrogance.
Anonymous says:
April 13, 2010 at 7:59 AM
“The meeting was concluded with prayer for me to be delivered from Satan.” WHAT?????
mom of ex-intern says:
April 13, 2010 at 8:08 AM
…once again…I’m stunned….
But then again, I shouldn’t be–my son wrote me or mentioned when we talked about how hungry he was all the time. I was always sending him care packages with peanut butter and protein bars–In my TM-brain-washed state, I just figured he was a growing boy…I gotta go call him and apologize now…
Oh wait–I just remembered a conversation where I asked him about getting enough food and he said they were told not to be gluttons and portion control was important in not being in the sin of gluttony…
Anonymous says:
April 13, 2010 at 8:36 AM
When I was an intern in 98-99, we were not allowed to have personal refrigerators in our dorm rooms and were dependent on the cafeteria. I remember during summer missions time, we had to eat the same food as the missionaries for two months. Almost every day, for both lunch and dinner, we had a sandwich that was mostly bread, a bag of chips, and a piece of fruit (usually apples were the only option). At one point, Teen Mania screwed up something with their water supply where it had too much bleach in it, and they still only offered us bleach water or lemonade made with bleach water to drink!!! It was so crazy that anyone thought that was okay!
Moriah says:
April 13, 2010 at 9:14 AM
wow. every new story that comes out stuns me. i have to fight the urge to call tm and raise my voice in protest and anger. i am anxious to see what the board has to say about these stories. they can’t possibly ignore this kind of behavior.
moriah
Eric P. says:
April 13, 2010 at 9:19 AM
Holy Moley. The lunatics are running the asylum, literally. (Yes, literally. I’ve talked to actual insane people who seemed more rational than that.)
I’m beginning to see an all-too-familiar pattern here: If I may offer a link of my own, I once wrote about it under the unlikely title Grace on a Snake.
Joe B says:
April 13, 2010 at 9:33 AM
seriously, it seems that alot of these stories are from alumni from several years ago. can we hear something from within the last year or 2? Its hard to believe TM is still running that way if we can’t see anything more recent, just a thought.
Anonymous says:
April 13, 2010 at 9:38 AM
Joe B
I graduated this past august, and none of these stories shock me…
Nunquam Honorablus says:
April 13, 2010 at 9:45 AM
“After learning that Katie Luce was very disciplined about her diet, I asked her some questions. She talked about some of the nutrient dense foods she feeds her family. I asked her why the Honor Academy doesn’t provide nutrient dense food for the interns or missionaries. She then told me that God will take care of you when you are doing things for him and that the foods that you eat will not really effect you.”
Does she not realize the hypocrisy in her statement?!??!?! I guess she herself is admitting to not doing the Lord’s work because she has to worry about what she eats!
I actually remember emailing Hasz about health concerns (I graduated in 2008, so here’s a recent one)! Katie Luce had just talked to us women about eating healthy (drinking organic milk, cooking and eating fresh vegetables, as opposed to canned ones that have all the nutritional value boiled out of them, etc).
I emailed him, asking what we were to do because any vegetable TM served was canned in some way (save for the salad), and he simply replied with,
“Salad is better than canned vegetables, canned vegetables are better than sugar.”
Well then! Silly me for asking such a question! Don’t I feel stupid??
Stephanie says:
April 13, 2010 at 9:55 AM
I had a roomamte who was vegeterian… and was extreemly underfed while at TM. (This was before refridgerators in the dorm rooms). She was told that being a veggie was against God’s will and that she needed to start eating meat or she would be put on probation.
Carrie Saum says:
April 13, 2010 at 10:09 AM
Jaqueline, can you clarify what year you were there?
Thank you, again, for sharing your story. I also developed severe health issues while I was there that masked another (unrelated) serious health issue. I was severely anemic as well, and could not do fasting days. I would drive into Lindale to eat dinner because I could not find protein on campus. It was very frowned upon, to say the least. I also would do fruit and vegetable fasts on my own about once a month when I started feeling really really run-down.
Having served on the mission field full time in a remote part of Guatemala, AND hosted teams there, I can say with all certainty that I ate better in Guatemala than I do here. Teen Mania chooses what is most cost-efficient, not what is best for the health of the interns. For all their talk of “excellence”, this is yet another area where they are a complete and epic FAIL.
kristen says:
April 13, 2010 at 10:28 AM
this infuriates me…. i was at TM in the early -mid 2000s and this stuff was still happening. i think it’s very interesting how healthy eating etc is promoted at TM, but then the interns are not given the resources necessary for a healthy and balanced meal plan…
@nunquam – i KNOW – the hypocrisy in katie’s statement… and dave’s response to your email… what a mature response on his part… not.
Layne says:
April 13, 2010 at 10:33 AM
I was a vegetarian before coming to TM (for about 4 years), but was unable to sustain myself on salads, fruits and bread (they _did_ offer that really great 12-grain bread) that was offered as an alternative or addition to the daily meat-based meals we were fed. I finally gave up (there was a lot of pressure put on me in regards to this), started eating the meaty foods, and gained about 15 lbs. Praise Jesus?
“Valencia, had a short unpleasant follow up with me. It is amazing how a woman who hadn’t spent any time trying to get to know me could take me down to ZERO, especially when her position was meant to be motherly.”
I really thought I was the only one who’d had this kind of experience with Valencia. She tore me to shreds, then sent me on my merry way bawling my eyes out with no resolution or, really, any idea of what had happened. She told me I was a failure (yes, she actually said “you are a failure”) and proved her point by noting that her telling me I was a failure had made me cry therefore I must realize somewhere inside of myself that it was true. Crying = a sign of guilt? I don’t know. It was a mess of a “conversation”, illogical and brutal.
It took me several months to finally realize how full of shit she was, but the damage had been done. Spent the rest of my internship trying to build up the confidence I had started with.
But back to the nutritional side of this post…
I co-own a work-in-progress organic farm. Lemme tell ya, it’s not that difficult to grow things. TM could easily, EASILY, build a greenhouse and raise chickens and/or goats. Small-scale farming is not impossible in Texas. I’m not saying you could sustain the entire campus, but you could suppliment. Furthermore, what about buying locally? What about helping sustain the community of Van and the surrounding areas? I’m sure they would appreciate TM throwing a little money their way (beyond construction) and interns would appreciate local produce, eggs, milk, REAL juices.
Nunquam Honorablus says:
April 13, 2010 at 10:43 AM
“TM could easily, EASILY, build a greenhouse and raise chickens and/or goats.”
I can tell you one BIG reason they would never, ever do that.
When I was there, it was common to joke about TM being a cult, “if only we started growing our own food”. Leadership even took the fact that they DON’T grow their own food, as immunity to the cult-card.
Eric P. says:
April 13, 2010 at 10:53 AM
Sorry, Leadership, but malnutrition of group members is one of the classic signs of membership on most “cult cards.” See #9 on this one, for instance.
“Omission of nutrients increases susceptibility to manipulation of one’s emotional ‘highs’ and ‘lows’.” –ibid.
(The irony of “not growing their own food” but still doing ESOAL should not be missed. If they’re that concerned about not looking like a cult…)
Eric P. says:
April 13, 2010 at 10:56 AM
(By “#9,” I mean #8.)
Candor says:
April 13, 2010 at 11:47 AM
Joe B – Like you, I’m interested in hearing recent interns’ stories to see if TMM has changed in any way since I was there. And for the sake of everyone involved, I honestly hope it has. However, it doesn’t matter if someone had a negative experience with them 5, 10, or a million years ago. They still experienced it and deserve to finally be acknowledged.
Nunquam Honorablus – I clearly remember that too. As if growing your own food was the least of your worries with being synonymous with “a cult.” That makes me laugh out loud.
Jacqueline – Wow. I am so totally blown away by your story. I wish I could give you a big hug. It makes me sick to my stomach to think that you were punished for suggesting a healthier alternative. I cannot believe you were told all that b.s. about rebelling against God for genuinely wanting more nutritional food for you and your fellow interns.
Also, I think I might have been there the same time as you. I remember the video as well as an ironically overweight dietician giving us nutritional advice.
Shannon Kish says:
April 13, 2010 at 11:48 AM
kymberly, I felt the same way about the Hasz Personal Fund.
Incredible that everything seems to be everyone else’s fault at TM. it is never TM’s fault. They are perfect. It is always interns who are rebellious and negative.
These stories are beginning to really piss me off!
Shannon Kish says:
April 13, 2010 at 12:05 PM
Carrie,
She had to be there in early 2000s. I was there then. I am not sure who all is still on staff, but I don’t think Nikki works there anymore.
Anonymous says:
April 13, 2010 at 12:37 PM
Anon @ 8:36 AM
I remember when the water supply was messed up. I remember that it was something like the chlorine used to purify the water was still pumping into the water tank but the water pump had broken. After they got the water pump fixed, there was still too much chlorine in the water. When I brought up the horrible chlorine taste in the water, I was told that there was nothing that could be done, we would just have to run the water until the system purged the excess chlorine. For about two days I went without water because it tasted so bad, and it took a good week for the taste to leave the water.
Funny, looking back I never questioned being told to just drink the water. But being reminded of the incident today has me smiling at my own adolescent naivete.
Anonymous says:
April 13, 2010 at 12:50 PM
Thanks Jaqueline. Your story explains alot. I already struggled with an eating disorder before the HA but it just got worse while I was there. We must have been there around the same time because in the beginning of my year we had NO salad bar and mid way through they added one.
I know that your email didn’t get the effect that you needed at that time but I am proud of you for standing up like you did. You were brave in doing that. When I was an intern, I wouldn’t have had that kind of courage. I tried to lay low and get out of there.
Sometimes I wish that I knew other people were having a hard time like me. Maybe we could’ve fought together instead of being one by one thrown to the WOLVES.
Jacqueline says:
April 13, 2010 at 2:39 PM
I was there August 2000-2001.
You’ll probably figure out who I am in the next part. . .feel free to email me, RA has my contact information, or you can look me up on the alumni site. I don’t want my mom knowing about this post, for obvious reasons.
Frankly I am blown away by the anger on these comments, it’s pretty confusing to wade through all the intense emotions of such complicated garbage. In some ways I feel bad for talking about these “secrets” and yet, at the same time I feel this enormous relief that I don’t have to hide anymore and that these things were WRONG WRONG WRONG!!!
Please pray for me.
hitchcockhill says:
April 13, 2010 at 4:06 PM
I am in shock at this story. How on earth could you be in rebellion? OMG. I’m sort of fuming right now. If a car could run on my fumes it would get me from NYC to Garden Valley in 5 hours. It is now official in my mind – the culture at TMM is officially insane. I’m thankful that while I was there I didn’t have to deal with any serious issues with them. Maybe that’s why God protected me while I was there. I’ve lived through a lot of trauma, and having gone through something like that at TMM probably would have been a nail in the coffin to my spirit. I guess that happened at some point in a different way – but yeah – thanks for sharing. I really hope more people step out and share if they are reading through this and are feeling tempted. Please email the board as well.
Shiloh says:
April 13, 2010 at 4:34 PM
@Joe B- Is this the staff member from T.M. that was there for like 5 years? If so we were there the same time for two years together. And if you actually READ the stories (slight rebuke to you for not being a thinker and posting a comment before looking.) You will see, I think, probably more stories from within the last 5 years than the older ones. The older alumni only JUST found out about this sight so their stories are starting to come in.
Kate M says:
April 14, 2010 at 7:52 AM
Sorry but I think this is BS. I am healthy young woman that stayed very healthy at the HA for 4 years eating in the cafeteria. Did the food suck, yes it did at times but did it have nutritional value, yes it did if you chose to eat what was given to you and not go overboard. I ate everything that was served for the most part during every meal with the exception of all the desserts and I stayed active and fit and was able to remain in good health. the key is that I did not snack on my own all the time in the office or the dorm room which is what I saw happen all the time with the other ladies there. It would have been great if the HA would have served more organic foods and what not but I can guarantee you that this would mean they would have had to cut another area of the internship to give to the food budget and then we’d all be complaining about what they cut so how can they win?, by raising the cost of the internship?…maybe, who knows. I can tell you that I worked closely with the finance department while there and saw the HA budget and I can tell you they were consistantly in the red because they didn’t charge the interns what was actually spent on them…..if you want to see them do more organic stuff, ie: garden or greenhouse, donate the stuff for them to do it and I bet you anything they’d do it…..whoever said Dave won’t do it because it is viewed of cultish is silly, can you give reference the specific time he said that? I just got off the phone with him and he said if alumni wanted to donate the materials they would be more than willing to keep it going but since it doesn’t seem that we’re willing to help people here other than “warn them of whats to come”, I’m sure nobody here would be willing to do that, am i right? 😉
Jacqueline I appreciate your thoughts in your other 2 posts of your story but I question this one as I know it is possible to stay completly healthy eating in the caf and I know for a fact I’m not the only one.
Jacqueline says:
April 14, 2010 at 9:04 AM
Thank you Kate for your honest opinion.
My great grandmother lived a long life though she enjoyed a diet of spam, coffee and cigarettes in her later years. As I learn more about nutrition, there are basic laws and they may not catch up with you if you have great genes, the problem can lie later in life and when you start to reproduce and the genes you hand over on the next generation are effected. Diseased states are not always as obvious as mine was.
Recommended reading: Nutrition and Physical Degeneration
Layne says:
April 14, 2010 at 9:58 AM
Kate M. – Despite beginning your comment with “this is bs” (not a very graceful attitude toward a lady who just lay open old wounds in a public forum), I also appreciate that you are showing an opposing side to this particular discussion. Along with you, I believe that many of the male interns and very blessed females survived just fine on the TM diet. But you’re disregarding differences in body types here. Yes, _you_ did ok eating in the cafe everyday. Great! I mean, really, good for you and your metabolism. Perhaps your diet before TM and the diet offered by TM were very similar and the shift was only slight. I assure you, however, that was not the case for many interns.
Furthermore, what exactly are you arguing? You agreed that the food sucks, but then you turned your commentary onto yourself, showing that if only a person had the will power to stay away from desserts and snacking, they would have stayed perfectly healthy. From what I gathered, Jacqueline did not have a problem with over-eating. It was a lack of nutritional value in the foods that she _did_ consume that caused her health problems. And it was defensive attitudes such as yours that completely dismissed her problems, flipped them around to make it seem like it was her own fault. The food is not the main issue here (though the food _is_ an issue) it’s the secrecy, blame, dismissal, and shame that came along with pointing out that the food sucks.
Also, just to note, organic and nutritional are not synonymous. You don’t have to have an all-organic diet to meet daily nutritional needs. You do, however, need to eat real food. Remember the “orange juice”? It was closer akin to Kool-Aid than a juice. Powdered eggs? How difficult would it have been to offer real eggs and O.J.? I understand the financial situation, but how about this? Cut back on the number of interns admitted every year. Smaller class, fewer mouths to feed, fatter budget for foods. I know this is not an option for TM, because they are a business and the fewer staff they have the less calls are made, which means less butts in the seats, less kids on the mission field, less churches at the summer camps…essentially less money for an already-in-the-red ministry. I knew even when I was an SA, the whole darn thing needed an overhaul. I think many of the staff recognized this and probably still do today. It’s a sinking ship and instead of the captain and crew helping women and children into the life boats, people are getting thrown overboard.
Recovering Alumni says:
April 14, 2010 at 11:13 AM
Kate – Do not ever come to this blog and call someone’s story BS ever again. That is absolutely uncalled for. I’m sure Dave would be so proud of your response here….
Moriah says:
April 14, 2010 at 11:27 AM
Kate.
Your response is poorly written and does not present your side of the story well at all. If anything, it exposes even further evidence of the ignorance and arrogance at Teen Mania. Way to represent.
moriah.
Jacqueline says:
April 14, 2010 at 11:49 AM
To quote Layne,
“the food is not the main issue here (though the food _is_ an issue) it’s the secrecy, blame, dismissal, and shame that came along with pointing out that the food sucks.”
I would like to add: threats, defensiveness, and arrogance. These are the heart of the problem.
Kate M. says:
April 14, 2010 at 7:00 PM
Just for clarification I am not at Teen Mania, could care less what Dave Hasz thinks of my life….I am not run by Teen Mania nor do I allow myself to let what happened in the past dictate what I’m doing now or in the future. I do apologize if I offended anyone, not my intent but simply a spur of the moment thing.
Kate M.
Shannon Kish says:
April 15, 2010 at 8:40 AM
Congratulations to you Kate M. You were able to survive a system which sets you up for failure, unlike many of us here on this blog.
But your ignorance and arrogance towards those of us that were not strong enough Christians (as DH and some would say) and not able to make it out unscathed is disgusting and uncalled for.
If you cannot express your thoughts without degrading us, then we don’t welcome you here!
Z says:
April 15, 2010 at 10:12 AM
I can’t believe a dietician plans the meals on campus! I thought the poor nutrition was a result of lack of thought. It blows my mind that someone is actually planning such a poor menu!
Beans and lentils are about as cheap as food comes. I’m not sure budgeting is really the reason behind the poor food choices.
I am so, so sorry, Jacqueline, to hear your story. The whole situation is inexcussable.
Eric P. says:
April 15, 2010 at 1:16 PM
Is “That all happened several years ago” the new TM Party Line? I think I’ve seen it a few times here in the past couple days.
Which of course leaves unanswered the question, “If they’ve recently decided their past actions were mistaken and changed them accordingly, why haven’t they, y’know, apologized to anybody?”
Shannon Kish says:
April 15, 2010 at 1:38 PM
good question Eric, one we will probably never have an answer to.
Nunquam Honorablus says:
April 15, 2010 at 3:31 PM
My guess is that Hasz ranted about this site a couple of days ago during class, and said something along the lines of “this all happened a long time ago and we’ve fixed it so there”. So now, interns are coming onto here to regurgitate his rhetoric.
I’uno; just my hypothesis.
reluctant-intern says:
April 15, 2010 at 4:24 PM
And for what it’s worth, I when I was an intern, a good friend of mine was also diagnosed with malnutrition on campus. I personally gained about 25-30 lbs my year there and I know MANY other interns who did as well. Not only was it the food quality, but also the stigma of cleaning your plate.
This wasn’t an isolated incident.
Jacqueline says:
April 15, 2010 at 5:36 PM
The level of athleticism required of interns + The stressed state of sharing a small room with 5 others + A new high demands environment far from home = a considerably higher requirement of macro (healthy fats & fiber) plus micro-nutrients.
It’s very possible that my state of malnourishment was so obvious as a reflection of how stressed out the rest of my life was while I was there, people are holistic, and every area pours into the other.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zgfq0RxIakQ
Anonymous says:
April 21, 2010 at 4:47 PM
Shannon Kish,
Were you a January intern class of 2001? I think I was there with you.
Kim Matthews
I was.
Anonymous says:
April 22, 2010 at 9:34 AM
I thought so. How have you been? Whose core were you in?
Jenni P says:
September 24, 2010 at 4:33 PM
Now I am truly astounded. I have always respected Valencia, having known her a -little- better than the average intern. Though she sometimes taught things I thought leaned a little to the “name it and claim it” crowd, I just ignored it at the time, as I did most of the confusing teachings on what being filled with the Holy Spirit means. I cannot, however, excuse this lapse in judgment on her part as ONLY a “lapse” in judgment. You would have to be INTENTIONAL to treat someone this way, not once, but twice.
*shakes head* I am deeply saddened for what you went through. I begin to see that even people whom I would have trusted (based on my OWN personal experience with them) to be reasonable and competent to see the reality of a situation such as yours, simply were NOT.
Anonymous says:
January 18, 2012 at 6:19 PM
Cults purposely starve their followers and feed them high-in-sugar dies in order to better brainwash and control people because they are more susceptible mentally and emotionally when their body is physically exhausted and depleted of nutrients.
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