This is a multi-part post where I discuss little nuggets of wisdom from a YouTube video and how it applies to our experiences (or at least mine). Back in October of 2021, Cinema Therapy on YouTube released an episode on trauma and imposter syndrome – two very different topics, but connected in a fantastic sci-fi movie. If you are unfamiliar with their work, these two self-ascribed “YouTube Dads” select a movie and analyze it for its excellence as a movie as well as the mental health themes present. One of the gentlemen is a licensed therapist and the other a filmmaker. The following episode covers Star Trek: First Contact which has two main story arcs: a starship captain hellbent on revenge and a rough-around-the-edges inventor on the brink of redefining humanity. While imposter syndrome is a great topic to discuss, this post will focus on the trauma portions. You can watch the episode below.
(Trigger Warning: There’s some body horror elements, like a needle in the eye, upfront. If that’s not your thing, jump ahead to 6:52. For context, Captain Picard experienced some heavy trauma years before the movie’s setting and the movie is trying to get the viewer into his current headspace.)
Of course the trauma that Picard faced in the show was extreme, it makes for excellent television. However, I think that it illustrates the harm any trauma can cause, regardless of severity.
Our Experience
At 19:18, the audience stand-in character confronts Picard because of his refusal to deal a last-resort blow to the Borg and detonate his ship. It is here that we learn more about his experience with his assimilation and the rationale behind his bullheadedness. It is an intense scene where Picard’s trauma response gradually escalates until he eventually explodes. Afterwards (22:32), Jonathan comments that he’s in his lizard brain, a metaphor for our rationale staying in the cerebellum, our autonomic system. When confronted with a traumatic or dangerous event, our brains get stuck in the fight/flight/freeze mechanism. Everything is automatic; we fight, run away, or we’re deer caught in the headlights. Afterwards, when we are regulated and reach homeostasis, we can think clearly because we return to our human brain, where we can use our frontal cortex and have rational thought. It’s surviving vs. thriving.
There’s a popular metaphor for triggers: the Zone of Tolerance. Everyone has a zone, we all can take a certain amount of stress before we finally snap. Imagine day-to-day sources of stress that everyone deals with (work/school, daily chores, paying rent/mortgage/bills, etc.) as a block and stress from trauma as another block stacked on top. As these blocks stack, an individual gets closer and closer to reaching their breaking point. An individual who has experienced trauma will most likely have a shorter Window of Tolerance because they are already at an elevated state of stress.
Our windows can change from person to person and even from day to day. Have you ever felt like you were level-headed compared to a friend or sibling? Or, the opposite, where you’re the one with the short fuse? What about different days? Most days I can keep my cool really well, but some days (and especially when I’m hungry) I snip at my girlfriend much more readily.
To add to this metaphor, the Window of Tolerance is more of a zone between hyperarousal and hypoarousal. Think about a time when you reached your breaking point, what was your response? Did you feel heated and flustered, ready to lash out? Or did you shut down and feel numb? Is this your typical response or do you switch depending on the trigger? For me, when I get frustrated because a piece of technology isn’t working properly, I tend to get angry and break things. Thankfully, when people piss me off, I’m more likely to shut down and withdraw. I say lucky because I believe breaking things is much easier to reconcile than breaking people.