The last time I spoke with the Board of Directors, they assured me that, based on our letters, a panel would be convened to investigate several key areas of the Honor Academy. They would seek out members of the panel from the fields of medicine, psychology and theology. As part of their investigation, the panel would interview both current and former members of the Honor Academy. The Board also stated that once the panel was assembled, they would publicly disclose the names of all its members.
Instead, I have learned that the “investigation” is now over. They did not disclose who was on the panel, what their credentials were or what their possible conflicts of interest were.
The Board’s response to our complaints of physical, emotional, and spiritual abuse can be found here: www.recoveringalumniresponse.com. The first thing you may notice is the profound lack of any form of apology.
Their letter is so obviously riddled with inaccuracies and whitewashing that I hardly feel the need to write up a rebuttal. Surprisingly, they didn’t even try to make this look like a legitimate investigation. If you have any questions about my response on any particular point, please feel free to ask in the comments. The gist of their argument is that the majority of these complaints are old and have already been “fixed.” This couldn’t be further from the truth. If anything, things have gotten worse over time and this website includes many stories and comments from the last 2-3 years that illustrate that.
In addition to the letter written by the Board, they have included a letter from psychologist Douglas Neal who states that the Honor Academy is a wonderful program whose graduates are “psychologically and emotionally sound.” Dr. Neal has two children that have attended the Honor Academy and it also appears that his brother, David Neal, is actually a current staff member in the Honor Academy. Obviously, this is a conflict of interest.
Pastor Jack Hayford’s letter was perhaps the most disappointing of all. Jack Hayford is someone I’ve respected since I was a child. I listened to his radio broadcast growing up and thought that he was at least one person on the Board who would truly listen to the cries of the broken. I found his mischaracterizations of the blog and its participants very hurtful. I’m not sure if he actually took the time to read the packet I sent him or if he was just regurgitating what Ron Luce has told him.
To the many of you that are feeling hurt and betrayed over the Board’s incredibly dismissive attitude, let me encourage you with this thought from an intern from the Tulsa years and an active member of our forums:
Anyway, I wanted to comment here to encourage everyone to take heart. Rather than comment on what I view as spiritual principles, I’d like to comment on a very American principle. Whether TM blows us off or not. Whether nobody ever reads these stories or not. Whether anyone even cares, something very, very powerful has happened over at the RA blog: Freedom of the Press.
Everyone here, despite TM’s ridiculous and Orwellian vow that you keep your mouths shut, has exercised your right and your responsibility to tell your story. That’s a beautiful thing. If even one person is discouraged from participating, or even one current intern is encouraged…it’s worth it. All of this is worth it and it matters. Don’t think that because a bully (TM and their board of directors…and I’m looking at you, Bully Jack Hayford…shame on you all) dismisses you as a nobody that what you’re talking about doesn’t matter. It absolutely matters.
Christian subculture is due for an overhaul. I for one am tired of it. It’s bigger than Teen Mania, and yet Teen Mania represents so much of what makes me sick about “ministries” and other para-church organizations.
Thank you, RA, for starting this discussion in our community. And thank you everyone else who has been brave enough to participate in the discussion, whether by sharing your story or otherwise immersing yourselves in the discussions here in the forums. Whether Christian or pagan or atheist, you’re a part of something that I personally believe is valuable beyond comprehension, and that is our right to speak out. The right of the few to stand up to the many.
50 comments:
I want to post something insightful or encouraging, but all I can think of are expletives.
June 3, 2010 7:45 AM
Anonymous said…
I’m very disappointed that the Board did not do more. I’m also angry that the letters make it sound like this is about ONE digruntled person! Why did they even bother to pretend they were going to look into this???
June 3, 2010 8:29 AM
Anonymous said…
“we felt that the ESOAL program could continue with important minor modifications. Next, the group is making modifications to the process of helping the students transition back into modern society. “
It would be nice to know what specific modifications are being made. We are working on it doesn’t really cut it.
Open game plans would be more appropriate in my opinion as they are required when interns need to make adjustments in their own lives. This letter from the board just seems to be a ploy to quickly move on with out giving the specifics of the changes being made. Makes one wonder if changes are truly taking place at all.
June 3, 2010 8:55 AM
Anonymous said…
We are working on it is the standard response sent out by DH and RL. It’s the classic response to get you to go away. I’ve seen several of them. It just makes me laugh.
June 3, 2010 8:58 AM
Cesna said…
Wow. Just…. wow. That’s all I can say without going on a tyrade.
June 3, 2010 9:29 AM
Eric P. said…
I was surprised and saddened to read Hayford’s response as well; it seemed deeply out of character for what I’ve seen of his ministry.
It seriously leaves me wondering whether he (and anyone else on the board) even saw the full file of stories, or if the TM bigwigs just said, “Hey, there’s some crank out there slandering us, can you say a few words in our defense?”
Dear Pastor Hayford,
With all respect, you’re either mistaken or deceived if you think this “dust storm” is one individual complaining. Did you read, for instance, Niki’s Story or Lauren’s or Ashley’s? Would you say that the way TMM leadership handled those situations (e.g. making Niki sign a waiver) was “respectful and sensitive”? What would your response have been if this was the experience your daughter had, as it was the experience somebody else’s daughters had? What about the other sixty pages of true stories?
I really want to know what your heart actually is toward these dozens of hurting people, and to the system that perpetuated and covered up their pain.
Yours Respectfully,
Eric
June 3, 2010 10:12 AM
Anonymous said…
I am FURIOUS after reading their response. I actually think I might be even angrier than I was at the beginning. If they don’t want to listen to us or apologize to us – so be it. We can’t MAKE anyone do anything. However, I think they’d take things much more serious if media outlets starting covering this. Would they give CNN another interview if CNN knew about everything going on NOW? I think we should find out. We’ve given them thousands of dollars and months or years of our lives. At the very minimum, we deserve an apology.
June 3, 2010 10:22 AM
Mynda said…
Im glad that you posted the comment from the forum. We need to remember that this is about people. Peoples hearts and minds. If TM asks for forgiveness or not. Well said and well written. I stand behind you and support you all.
June 3, 2010 11:14 AM
Heather said…
You know, I would settle for even having them just send out a document of all of their memos to the staff about the changes they are making. Or even the outline to the speeches they are giving current interns about what is going on. At least it would be a start to what details they are addressing.
I HATE that I am just a part of a group. We are individuals who went back to our homes confused, lost and hurt. I think I am one of the fortunate ones where it has only taken 5 years to heal from this. A lot of us are followers of Christ trying to re-connect with the Lord and others after traumatic experiences. We are a group of people looking to those who were our spiritual leaders in many ways, for closure and an apology. I honestly wonder if they even know the damage they are capable of doing to impressionable, ignorant, high school graduates. Their apologies are showing the full seriousness of the issues.
June 3, 2010 12:44 PM
Nunquam Honorablus said…
You know, honestly, I don’t give two figs about a written or verbal apology. Words are cheap.
What I want is a tangible change. And a BIG one. Seeing those changes made and seeing TM take the stance of “Yes, we are changing many things, because X Y and Z was spiritually damaging, so in the interests of our interns, we are completely revamping how we do things” is worth more than all the “I’m sorry”‘s in the world.
June 3, 2010 12:54 PM
Anonymous said…
I cannot believe the letters from Jack Hayford and Douglas Neal. It sickens me to think that these men wrote responses without actually reading the letters and stories from alumni (because if they had there is NO WAY they would have carelessly blown them off). I thought maybe THEY had more integrity than that. Apparently I was wrong. You reap what you sow. They’ll get theirs.
June 3, 2010 12:57 PM
Shannon Kish said…
I really feel that perhaps this response from the BOD was done in haste kind of like- “Oh snap, they are really POed at us and we need to formulate a response that will make them a little less POed for a bit.” And what they did was an utter failure on so many levels.
While I agree with Nun about apologies, an apology would at least be a start. Heck a public admission of guilt would be a start!
I wrote the chair of the board asking for a listing of what changes have been made because as we have read, things seemed to have gotten worse over time and not better.
DH responded to a letter I wrote him basically stating that they will NOT make any changes to the philosophy of the HA, though they have made other changes. That disheartens me greatly.
June 3, 2010 1:31 PM
Anonymous said…
Typical…high profile leaders who are not willing to stand up for the truth….sure, preach about truth, talk about how our culture needs this or that and is going to hell in a hand basket.
But when the truth comes to your corner of the universe, you sound more like a politician than a prophet….oh well, and people wonder why folks don’t give two bits about what Christians have to say?
Time to re-read the book of James, Jack and David….
June 3, 2010 2:38 PM
Anonymous said…
Dave Hasz was the one who taught me to look for the grain of truth in any criticism. Even if I personally didn’t believe the criticism was true, I should look and see if there was anything I was doing (intentionally or not) to warrant that criticism. Why won’t TM follow their own teaching?!? Just because they didn’t intend to hurt interns doesn’t mean they didn’t. Just because the HA wasn’t designed to intentionally do harm doesn’t mean it doesn’t harm. If they get serious about repairing the problems, they will look for unbiased opinions, not pats on the back from TM partyliners.
June 3, 2010 2:55 PM
shouldcareless said…
If TM continues on without making changes, their intent changes. Once awareness is brought to an issue, regardless of the venue or motives by which it comes to light, we are responsible for making changes to the best of our abilities in order to restore those whom we have hurt, and to prevent further injury. If we do not, if we become passive and allow things to continue as they are, or worse, make a half-hearted effort to change surface issues, we become willfully negligent, and even abusive at times.
So, I’m giving TM a pass on the last 15 years. I’m willing to mark it up to good intentions gone wrong. But from this point forward, they will be entirely negligent and responsible for those they abuse, ignore, hurt, or harm from this point on. There are no more excuses.
June 3, 2010 3:44 PM
Mikaela said…
Were we foolish for thinking TM would listen and care and really attempt to make things right? Maybe. Have you ever heard about a cult doing anything of the sort?
I’ve never heard of a cult apologizing to a former participant. “Sorry we tricked you into thinking we were a legitimate organization. Sorry we took thousands of dollars from you and your family. Sorry we inadvertently caused your eating disorder/nervous breakdown/permanent physical injury. How can we make reparations?” Apologizing is not something cults do.
Also, cults don’t just get fixed. They don’t just make a few changes and suddenly turn into something legit. Why not? Because the cult leaders are still cult leaders.
What DO cults do? Well, sometimes they get exposed to the media and forcibly shut down!
I know most of the people on this site have been hurt and are trying to heal. And we’re trying to be positive and do things the right way. We want to see changes so other people don’t get hurt like we did. Even if TM can’t change, WE will all change and grow and heal and move on with our lives. Why? Because we CAN. That’ll have to be enough of a victory for now.
June 3, 2010 4:49 PM
Krista said…
So…this is something that I would not normally encourage, but given the fact that we’ve continually tried to address our issues with TM and continually been dismissed, has anyone looked into contacting any media outlets about our concerns, specifically health and safety issues? I’m not saying this is the answer, but I’m just curious what everyone thinks?
June 3, 2010 4:54 PM
Shiloh said…
What I’m wondering is can we get back pay for money T.M. stole from us. I think we should call them out on every illegal thing they’re doing too.
I’ve called around to a few labor departments and a few things T.M. has done is actually illegal, but when you first get there (the internship) they have you sign a paper that you agree to be a volunteer. As long as they have that piece of paper, they can get away with it.
I have ZERO doubt if some more alumni actually stepped it up we would have quite a few stories of child labor law violations and probably some proof that T.M. spends their money illegally.
June 3, 2010 5:21 PM
Eric P. said…
Krista– I think that’s an entirely biblical response: “But if he will not listen, take one or two others along, so that ‘every matter may be established by the testimony of two or three witnesses.’ If he refuses to listen to them, tell it to the church; and if he refuses to listen even to the church, treat him as you would a pagan or a tax collector.” (Matthew 18:16-17). [For “tax collector” read “Rod Blagojevich”–EP]
TM can only afford to ignore this issue for so long, and I’m guessing not much longer. Eventually the number of survivors speaking out will certainly reach an unavoidable critical mass, and the ensuing fallout will be a lot worse for TM since they brushed it off this time around.
June 3, 2010 5:29 PM
Anonymous said…
Lets collect information on money mis-spending and send it to RA. Anything illegal (or immoral or unethical) regarding $$ and TM send to RA. Emails, videos, recordings, stories. Anything.
Anon.
June 3, 2010 5:37 PM
Mikaela said…
As far as child labor laws go, I’m not familiar with any of the actual laws, but I did start the internship when I was only 16 years old. I was the youngest intern in my class.
June 3, 2010 6:04 PM
Candor said…
“I’ve never heard of a cult apologizing to a former participant… Apologizing is not something cults do.” Mikaela hit the nail on the head.
This only solidifies the fact that it IS a cult. A normal “Christian ministry” would not try to dismiss everything negative that was being brought to the light. They would try to share the love of Jesus and fix the problems even if it meant fixing themselves.
June 3, 2010 6:47 PM
Liz (Engskow) Davila said…
Sorry, but not surprised, to hear this.
The ironic thing is, I think this dismissive response proves RA’s point perfectly.
June 3, 2010 8:19 PM
Moriah said…
Hear hear!
A word to the wise and wonderful.
For me, the greatest part of this process has been sounding my voice and hearing your voices.
I never put any trust or hope in any of the Teen Mania board members.
I have thought for a long time that they are a bit foolish, wrapped up in their own spiritual importance, and arrogance, feeding each others ego in the name of business and God.
The lightest most beautiful part of this journey is not their response to us, but is the fact that we had the courage to tell our stories, to them and to each other. It is the support and solidarity we have found through sharing. It is the love and kindness we give each other and it is the unique understanding we have together as a collective.
Sending my love to each one of you.
Moriah
June 3, 2010 8:29 PM
The Cult Next Door said…
Report these nuts to the IRS…protest their tax-free status…get a lawyer through one of the groups that aids victims…do something anything (within the law) to stop these abusers before they hurt anyone else. Has anyone contacted local media?
June 3, 2010 8:35 PM
Anonymous said…
Hey, if you search for ASS in the response site the “letter from clinical psycologist” shows up. Seems appropriate.
June 3, 2010 8:44 PM
Carrie Saum said…
Something that just struck me about Jack Hayford’s letter: He condemns those who would rise up against Mega-Christian movements (such as TM), and then tells those who would question or disagree with him to take it up with the BOD chairman. Jack has washed his hands of this whole thing. Sad.
(Oh, and also, he dismisses the use of media and internet for the purpose of communicating, and then throws that one back on our generation. That one kind of made me giggle.)
The bottom line for me is that we have received healing here, and will continue to share our stories (I hope) and provide a safe haven for those who will be hurt, and a voice of reason and Love to those rival who are wholly unreasonable and act without Love..
June 3, 2010 10:11 PM
Carrie Saum said…
*to rival those*
June 3, 2010 10:13 PM
Old School Betty said…
hear hear Carrie Saum….
A bunch of us old school interns are appalled at what has been happening. I too am approaching things from the perspective, that despite the negative response from the BOD and TM, a lot of healing has been taking place. Where there is healing, there is freedom…isn’t that the whole point of the Gospel?
June 3, 2010 10:50 PM
Anonymous said…
I am not shocked that this is the response. These men and woman are so full of pride! Pride comes before the fall and it is only a matter of time before TM is done! Too bad Ron or Dave did not pull a Ted Haggard…
June 4, 2010 1:20 AM
Old School Betty said…
There is still grace and forgiveness for Ted Haggard. He is a broken man. Shame on you for even wishing that upon either man. Regardless of how much people dislike the reactions put forth by the BOD, are response is to turn the other cheek and I am not referring to the pair below our waists!!!
June 4, 2010 1:35 AM
Old School Betty said…
*our response….shame on me for not double checking my writing…
June 4, 2010 5:09 AM
Recovering Alumni said…
No shame for anybody here. 🙂
June 4, 2010 7:38 AM
Anonymous said…
We need to go to the press in a more open way. I have been speaking out against the HA since about oct of last year. Its been ten years for me, I still struggle every day with the crap they put me through.
June 4, 2010 7:41 AM
Shannon Kish said…
Anon, I agree. Join the forums… we have been discussing just that! 🙂
June 4, 2010 9:43 AM
Cliff and Tami said…
I’ve been silently reading this blog for some time and discussing it with older/Tulsa interns a bit but have never posted a comment. I was an intern long ago 94/95 and was very involved with TM for many years -although my last “trip” was in 2002. I long ago disassociated myself with TM, with the exception of good friends from my intern year, but felt it important to finally just say I support all of you in your quest for healing, your need and right to share your story, your desire to see justice..all of it. As many have said the Board response was for the most part meaningless – a sad generic attempt to present themselves in the “positive” light and sweep all those that are publicly sharing your stories under the rug. I don’t agree with every comment here..but I do agree that TM is in the wrong and I hope you all know that there is support from us “older” interns even if we never experienced the same HA that you did.
Tami
June 4, 2010 9:04 PM
Heather said…
Thank you Tami. I appreciate your support.
June 4, 2010 10:01 PM
Anonymous said…
I have learned quite a lot about HA mostly from this blog. I was half-decided on joining the HA since a good friend of mine just finished, and was working for them until very recently, who was raving about how “it would transform me”. The more research I did the more appalled I was by the horror stories of previous interns.
The reason this is so very important to me is that I was saved in a very Holiness Pentecostal church and the Lord started to show me just how backwards all of it was. It’s taken several years to heal over a lot of the spiritual abuse I endured at that church, and I don’t know what I would’ve done if I had entered into another atmosphere like that. I deal heavily with self-condemnation, and I distance myself from a lot of Christians who have backward ideas about grace and works, because I always end up confused and hating myself.
June 5, 2010 12:34 PM
Heath Stoner said…
David Hasz has written a response to some of the questions that were brought up in the letters that were sent in to the board. This response will be uploaded to the site early next week.
We also want to have a conference call in a few weeks with anyone that wants to join. Everyone can stay Anonymous if they would like on the phone call. People can ask questions and we will answer them. The night and time will be decided in a few days.
For those that I am personally talking to on this site, I look forward to our continued interaction.
Heath Stoner
June 5, 2010 3:16 PM
Natalie said…
Awesome Heath! Thanks. 🙂
June 5, 2010 5:02 PM
Mike said…
“It seems that HA needs to continue to provide opportunities for the intern to integrate successfully back into society after the HA/ TMM experience is completed.”
Yeah, no thanks. I had enough of your influence when I was stuck in Garden Valley. I think the last thing interns need is more of Teen Mania’s input after they go home.
June 5, 2010 7:15 PM
Old School Betty said…
Mike. Your pain is real and I have no doubt that you are really trying to put things behind you, but the reality is there really should be some sort of transition from the internship/HA back to the real world. Even after 15 years, I can still remember how lonely I felt after graduating. Think about servicemembers adjusting to real life after a combat experience, it can be a hard emotional and mental adjustment…When I start to question the intention of my leadership (no matter who they are and what ministry/company they work for), I have to remind myself they are human, imperfect and I need to look at them through that lens rather than setting them up with the expectation of perfection and instead experiencing failure. Your pain, like so many others, is real and as we struggle to address the issues, remember that so many of us are praying for you guys. You are not alone.
June 5, 2010 10:44 PM
C.R. said…
I think that an independent party needs to be brought into this whole situation. I.e. local government or state government. Its been proven that HA is a cult. I dont think they could come up with the needed bs to get the govt to turn away from whats really going on. Get an agency to go in, ask for interviews with some of the interns that are not fully in the program. Those will be the ones that will tell it how it is. Not the super cleaned up crap that the plastic interns would give.
Just my 2 cents.
June 5, 2010 11:29 PM
z said…
Old School Betty – I like what you said here.
“When I start to question the intention of my leadership (no matter who they are and what ministry/company they work for), I have to remind myself they are human, imperfect and I need to look at them through that lens rather than setting them up with the expectation of perfection”
I’m going to go off topic a bit from your point, because you triggered something in my process of working through my experience.
The thing is, I KNEW my leaders were wrong when I was under their leadership. When I tried to respectfully disagree with them, they told me I was rebellious and forced me to compromise my personal values. They took away my right to set healthy boundries for myself.
It is easy to look back and realize the leadership were flawed human beings. . . it was so hard to be under their leadership, fully aware of the damage they were causing me, but feeling obligated to obey them.
I know that wasn’t your point, but your post just brought a little more clarity to my mind. Thanks 🙂
June 6, 2010 2:42 PM
oceanwaves said…
I’ve been following this blog with interest for some
time.
Although I personally have never attended an Aquire
the Fire event or the Honor Academy (I had never heard
of the Honor Academy before), I have a ministry
helping Christians, and others, recover from spiritual
abuse.
I have to say that the comments recently released
from the people supporting HA sound like classic
spiritual abuse. I can’t and don’t judge their
motives.
I find it disturbing when all the blame is shifted
back onto the hurting people who are categorized
as being complainers. The actual events and hurts
were not addressed. Even if a ministry is well
intended and is a great ministry in some respects
(I am not saying this of HA as I don’t have enough
experience with them to judge)…….that doesn’t
mean that hurts or abuses don’t actually occur.
This area of Christianity has a poor record for
knowing how to, or being willing to, acknowledge
real problems and try to deal with them. Problems
are going to occur where you have humans, and
that includes churches and ministries, whether
well intended, ignorant, or just plain human.
I believe forgiveness is important but forgiveness
doesn’t mean you have to suffer in silence, never
talk about anything, and pretend nothing happened
so as to make the abuser or the one who made
a mistake, or hurt you………feel better. We
are not required to make everyone feel better at
the cost of denying or allowing the wrongs to
continue without confrontation.
I encourage the owner of this blog and the
participants that God cares about your pain,
and my prayers are with you.
Oceanwaves
June 6, 2010 4:39 PM
Recovering Alumni said…
Re: re-entering society. I don’t think its healthy for a Christian program to be SOOOO different from the real world that you need help re-integrating into society. Shouldn’t it be training you how to live and interact in the real world? Not isolate yourself totally until you can barely interact like a normal human being…(perhaps a slight exaggeration on that last sentence, but you get my drift)
June 6, 2010 9:36 PM
Old School Betty said…
RA…you make a valid point about reintegration, but I want to take it one step further. While I do think there needs to changes made with how things are being handled, it is important to prepare people for transitioning from one cultural experience to another. Whether TM likes it or not, it is a bubble, and when the bubble breaks, the fall can be traumatic. I am not positing we should have this set up as a mandated function of HA operations, but debriefing is a critical function of making sure people aren’t left out in the cold.
June 6, 2010 10:10 PM
Nunquam Honorablus said…
Re: bubble
Haha, that reminds me. Hasz one time mentioned that he disagrees with everybody calling the HA a “bubble”, and instead prefers to liken it to a “harbor”, where you park your boat and refresh or something.
Then Ron did a class shortly after that to where we were supposed to “burn the boats” of our past. We were at a harbor, and we were supposed to burn the boats (sin, “unhealthy friendships”, etc) so that we wouldn’t be tempted to go back.
I dunno, slightly off-topic, but kind of eerie.
June 7, 2010 11:39 AM
Heath Stoner said…
We would like to have the conference call on Monday night, June 28th at 8pm Central Standard Time. Details about the phone number to call will come in the next week.
Heath Stoner
June 7, 2010 2:30 PM
The Cult Next Door said…
Just my two cents but like the poster above said… get some third party who can mediate that conference call. I would strongly suggest legal aid. This organization is powerful, well-funded and has shown itself dis-interested in the hurt it has propigated. Though I would love to see this be a story book ending where forgiviness is sought…the HA response so far doesn’t look promising. Please, please get someone who can protect your rights as you go into this…you can be darn sure HA will have their protection on full force…
June 7, 2010 4:49 PM